Remember being five and someone asking you “what do you want to be when you grow up?” You instantly knew; a doctor, actress, musician or teacher. But as years pass those aspirations seem to fog with confusion and doubt. With the pressure of attending school and holding down a steady job, life can fool you into thinking this is all it has to offer. I thought by now I would have my life together but that couldn’t be more false. I do not have my life together in the slightest.
I work and attend school full time. At many points throughout the week I get frustrated thinking I will be stuck in this position forever. Will I ever find a steady job? Was college a good decision? You are not going to be the same person at eighteen years old then you are at twenty-five. So why is it so frowned upon to not know what you want to do with your life at such a young age? I barely plan my meals everyday let alone plan the next twenty years. Then it dawned on me, it’s ok not to be content right now because I am not suppose to be. I am suppose to crave independence and feed my soul every opportunity that presents itself. You are not on anybody’s time clock but yours. If it means not attending a university or dropping everything and traveling the world, then do it. By the way it’s not the end of the world if you decide school isn’t for you. It would be a waste of money to go, hate it, and never use your degree. Do not let society, family, and personal relationships stop you from being you, even if you don’t know who you are yet.
I’ve learned to embrace my frustrations because let’s face it, no one else has it together either. The best part about not having it all together is you don’t need to be the same person you were yesterday. You can wake up and start over every morning. There does come a point where you can’t do that any more. DO IT while you can. In my opinion its cool not having it all together because my experiences have molded me into the person I am today.
Here is to not knowing where my life ends up and trust I will lead myself to where I need to be. Just be reassured the next time someone asks “what do you want to be when you grow up?” It’s ok to say “I don’t know”.